Well the Super Bowl is upon us and once again, 95% of football fans have to watch… the Patriots. Should we respect the greatness or admire Tom Brady for the ageless wonder he is? That’s material for another blog. Realistically, we will all regress to the same jealous hatred that has festered inside us for as long as we can remember.
There’s only one problem. Chris. MF. Hogan.
If you’re on this site, you probably know that he played middie for Penn State Lacrosse from 2007 to 2010, including all-ECAC as a junior, before transferring to Monmouth to play football. The rest is history. The Patriots’ veteran receiver has become a favorite of Lax Twitter™ where our bretheren never miss an opportunity to remind the world what he did in Happy Valley.
So how do you keep the hate train rolling, while continuing to support Hogan? We’ve got you covered.
Obnoxiously remind the party
NBC isn’t doing the broadcast this year, which means we’ll miss the famous video intro where our hero fixes his steely blue eyes on the camera and says, “Chris Hogan, Penn State Lacrosse.” So you have to take matters into your own hands. The first time Jim Nantz says his name on the broadcast, blurt out “Penn State Lacrosse” in your outside voice.
But it doesn’t stop there. Keep some fun facts handy. Like how he started every game as a freshman. Or how he selflessly transitioned to D-mid his senior season to give the Nittany Lions a stronger physical presence. Trust me, you’ll be a hit.
Long Third Downs
After a tackle for a loss and a holding call, the Pats could be facing a 3rd and 23. This is peak Hogan time. Root your tail off for him to catch a 19-yarder to pad those stats without moving the chains. Accomplishment for the kid, no consequence for the Rams.
The final stage of grief, which will probably set in after the Rams have left the Patriots 1:43 on the clock only down 5. You know Tom’s gonna do it again. You just know. At this point the only thing there is left to do is accept the inevitable and just hope Chris Hogan catches the winning touchdown. But realistically, it’ll be one of their three-headed monster in the backfield.